Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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