Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
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3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
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now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
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