Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
