Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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