Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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