then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize