well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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