we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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