I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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