honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I wish you could order shots online.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Randomize
