I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize