I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
