One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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