Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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