My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
