dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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