I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
