get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
