put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
