i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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