i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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