we have pet lesbian snakes
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.