great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
