I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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