White coat. Heels.
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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