HIV tests are more positive than that guy
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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