I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
