we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
The air was thick with penises
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
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