On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
