did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize