im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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