RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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