Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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