One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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