we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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