He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
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