can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize