well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some magic done to my vagina
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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