I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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