I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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