If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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