I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
