It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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