OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
