brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
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