i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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