Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Got a toothbrush?

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  (734): Got a toothbrush? http://tfl.nu/c7ae
  Replies (7) Good night (2246) Bad night (1141)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.

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  (314): Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem. http://tfl.nu/kucl
  Replies (29) Good night (2248) Bad night (776)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed

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  (301): Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed http://tfl.nu/1voz
  Replies (8) Good night (1173) Bad night (4810)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.

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  (605): woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder. http://tfl.nu/fadr
  Replies (7) Good night (3461) Bad night (947)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you

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  (214): If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you http://tfl.nu/i2kd
  Replies (7) Good night (1334) Bad night (2006)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.

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  (618): I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy. http://tfl.nu/it0x
  Replies (6) Good night (2568) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.

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  (301): He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship. http://tfl.nu/zlr0
  Replies (7) Good night (1002) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it

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  (774): Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down? (978): I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it http://tfl.nu/io4i
  Replies (6) Good night (1227) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.

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  (310): What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business. http://tfl.nu/a4r2
  Replies (5) Good night (2354) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.

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  (915): God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high. http://tfl.nu/a3ox
  Replies (4) Good night (1169) Bad night (443)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?

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  (306): your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple? http://tfl.nu/b4ff
  Replies (15) Good night (922) Bad night (398)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?

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  (780): Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office? http://tfl.nu/0lyw
  Replies (6) Good night (426) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.

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  (360): Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits. http://tfl.nu/3dqo
  Replies (5) Good night (1569) Bad night (372)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's

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  (828): We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's http://tfl.nu/vesc
  Replies (0) Good night (548) Bad night (310)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe

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  (617): I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe http://tfl.nu/6675
  Replies (2) Good night (497) Bad night (149)

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