My hair reeks of homosexuality.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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