yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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