How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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