i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
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